It Only Hurts When I Walk

There comes a point in a skateboarder's life when walking around becomes more painful than skating around. Perhaps the non-isomorphic nature of skateboarding--the fact that you tend to use one side of your body consistently differently than the other side (even if you do half of your tricks switch like some young punk)--has an effect, over many years, of conditioning the body to a certain way of moving around that makes ordinary walking more and more difficult. For instance, my right knee aches more than my left, but my left ankle hurts more than my right. Some days, the pain in my lower spine is on the right side and sometimes it is on the left (rarely does it rest in the middle). And my front or right wrist is completely wrecked from falling on it so many times, while my other hand has little clue of what a sorry state its brother is in. Getting down the stairs in the morning is a real chore, and I wonder how difficult it would be to install one of those mechanical lift chairs to save myself the trouble. But then, getting in and out of chairs poses its own discomforts. The strange thing is, when I get on the skateboard I tend to feel much better. Sure my knees still ache and my modest beer belly flaps in the wind, but rolling around makes the joints feel better. Until I fall off, and have to recite the zen proverb "fall down seven times, get up eight". Or, in my case, "wipe out 7 439 times, drag yourself off the pavement 7 440." I've been thinking of taking up some more balanced activity, like roller skating (4 wheels good, 8 wheels better?). But I'm worried that the erosion to my joints has occurred in such a way that the even, back and forth motion of roller skates would be too much for my body to handle. I'd probably take off the left skate and start pushing myself around on one skate, just to feel better. And then what would I do with the extra left skate? It would be a complete waste.